The Best of Waking up...

I just saw an online ad for foldgers. I haven't had a television in close to a year (netflix, baby) so I don't get to see commercials much anymore. And I have to say if they are all as devoid of reality as this one was, it's no wonder why the millions of Americans in the flyover states look like bitter prunes before they hit thirty--all that bullshit has to do something to your exterior.

So, some boring looking blond woman who could be 23 or 33 runs into her Dad in the kitchen. And he's all, "you got in late last night." and she's all, "yeah...it won't be mattering anymore." Then she pulls out an engagement ring and Dad is all of a sudden taken with emotion and not at all concerned that she was late, but tells her that her fiance is a lucky man, which is what he told him when the beau asked for her hand in marriage the week before. So many things wrong with that scene.

If that girl is old enough to get engaged, then she is WAY too old to be living at home. If that girl is old enough to get engaged, then she is WAY too old to have her father questioning what time she comes home at night. And if she is in a serious enough relationship to get engaged, then it's none of her Dad's business that she was late b/c she may or may not have been fucking her boyfriend, which is what the commercial implies. And it is beyond archaic that fucking her boyfriend all of a sudden becomes okay once he puts a ring on her finger. And that he goes from the "bad" boyfriend who kept her up late into the "good" boyfriend by asking her Dad if he could be her official fucker for an indefinite period of time. I mean we reject Freud's theories of a sexual/romantic connection with our parents and yet it's okay in our society that a father has some kind of control over his daughter's vagina and what she does with it, and who she allows to touch it, and when. There is something wrong with that.

The best part of waking up...is Foldger's in your cup. All those puritanical values in a cyclical web of caffeine goodness. Advertising pandering to the middle class while at the same time reinforcing an outdated and unnecessary belief system. DE-LISHIS.