When Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher first met, he didn't give her the time of day and had his attention on someone else. The second time they met was at an impromptu party at his hotel room (following God knows what). After being at the party for some time, Demi took a break from the Hollywood debauchery, and getting shit-faced with people half her age, to step into the hall and make a phone call. Ashton happened to hear her on the phone, saying good night to her children. He was so moved that he told her it was "the most beautiful thing" he'd ever heard. And so, they started to text. The rest is recorded in the anals of true love history.

This story brought to you by Demi on her recent visit to Regis and Kelly.

I don't think I even need to say anything about this. I think it speaks for itself. All right, I'm going to say it. It is my opinion that Ashton did not have a good realtionship with his Mom. Okay. There you go.